Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
smell my finger.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize