Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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