Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
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