Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
