he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
