OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
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Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
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