Say something about gay babies.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
