just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
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