someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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