girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
