Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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