Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
His hands were made for my vagina.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
