Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Randomize
