my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
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It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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