omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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