Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(804): View more from Virginia

Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...

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(804): Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon... http://tfl.nu/v4as

Replies (5) Good night (999) Bad night (484)
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(423): View more from Tennessee

ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now

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(423): ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now http://tfl.nu/2rfn

Replies (27) Good night (5101) Bad night (886)
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(612): View more from Minnesota

Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar

(651): View more from Minnesota

If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either

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(612): Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar (651): If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either http://tfl.nu/6h7r

Replies (24) Good night (662) Bad night (4043)
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(713): View more from Texas

You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...

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(713): You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong... http://tfl.nu/oapp

Replies (30) Good night (4345) Bad night (591)
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(248): View more from Michigan

Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.

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(248): Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam. http://tfl.nu/6oxt

Replies (17) Good night (4257) Bad night (1207)
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(217): View more from Illinois

Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997

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(217): Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997 http://tfl.nu/gfc1

Replies (34) Good night (1198) Bad night (5022)
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(250): View more from British Columbia

When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?

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(250): When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to? http://tfl.nu/e636

Replies (23) Good night (5369) Bad night (1280)
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(603): View more from New Hampshire

When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding

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(603): When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding http://tfl.nu/lhu6

Replies (7) Good night (1619) Bad night (2501)
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(334): View more from Alabama

Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"

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(334): Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick" http://tfl.nu/pihf

Replies (12) Good night (2634) Bad night (848)
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(971): View more from Oregon

I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity

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(971): I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity http://tfl.nu/5clm

Replies (4) Good night (798) Bad night (2765)
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(415): View more from California

I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.

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(415): I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level. http://tfl.nu/gvuc

Replies (2) Good night (904) Bad night (460)
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(214): View more from Texas

Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?

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(214): Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!? http://tfl.nu/oye4

Replies (4) Good night (769) Bad night (321)
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(614): View more from Ohio

Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.

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(614): Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane. http://tfl.nu/2bgv

Replies (6) Good night (1480) Bad night (238)
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(970): View more from Colorado

This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete

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(970): This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete http://tfl.nu/utyk

Replies (4) Good night (225) Bad night (547)
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(402): View more from Nebraska

He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.

(575): View more from New Mexico

Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.

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(402): He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team. (575): Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring. http://tfl.nu/j6bp

Replies (1) Good night (739) Bad night (215)

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