New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize