Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
