I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Randomize
