She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
