I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Randomize
