the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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