READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Randomize
