i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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