come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
