But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
