Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
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Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
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She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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