Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
