Buhtt sex?
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
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