Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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