she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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