the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
