..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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