the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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