just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
my penis made a compromise with my morals
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
