So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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