ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
You are a genius and a whore.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
