Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
