How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
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