Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize