You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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