I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
