dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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