all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
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