your room smells of hookers.
And success
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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