he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
