the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
