please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Randomize
