He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
My balls are so social today.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
