Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Randomize