Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I just cut my nipple shaving
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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