is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Randomize
